Mascots.jpg
LONDON-- Lawyers of ex-TV personality, party girl and racy yellow Teletubby Laa-Laa, have submitted a plea to British Courts seeking child support from the father of her new twins, John Terry.
 
Laa-Laa, weeping hysterically, said through a translator, "I was out on the town with Lindsay Lohan one night when John noticed me at Club One. He then sent over a bottle of Cristal. He thought I looked exotic. And even though I don't speak a word of human, he said he loved my voice. Turns out he was just shitty pissed. Then one thing led to another, and I woke up with his hand on my fuzzy-wuzzy ass. I was in shock so I ran to the chemist for the Morning After Pill, but they were closed."
Tea_Scones.jpg
In an effort to infuse some British Culture into the Olympic Tradition, Tea Co. has been granted exclusive rights to replace Gatorade as the only source of hydration for athletes.

Hahahahahaha-eh! Canada just got the last laugh.